Volume 01 Issue 13 part 2
Baby's First Comeback: BE
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On Sunday morning after BE dropped, I woke up and my first thought was, “I’m so lucky, I get to love Bangtan for a long time,” and I got very overwhelmed. LOL. As mentioned in part 1 of this newsletter, I took two days off last week for the comeback: Thursday, to emotionally prepare, and Friday, D-day (BE-day?).
Part of it is that I wanted to be active on ARMY Twitter. I don’t like the feeling that I ‘missed out’ on something, even though my group chats are pretty good at keeping me updated on the big things. I’ve been a fan of other bands and artists before, but this is the first time that I’ve really felt part of a fandom, and I wanted to soak it all up.
As with most other BTS events these past few months, my group chat with Ishy, Cam, and Raissa, and my chat with Aia were my stream of consciousness thoughts, and Twitter was the afterparty. The day started with a press conference at 10:00 AM, then a Youtube live countdown at 12:30 PM, the music video premiere and album drop at 1:00 PM, then a live special on Vlive app at 4:00 PM where they discussed the album.
I knew it would be a full day, but what I didn’t expect was that the events of the day were just a kick-off. What I had thought would be a party with people tweeting their reactions to the songs was actually more like a study group all-nighter. ARMY had goals and strategies for every platform (Youtube, Spotify, Shazam, Apple Music, etc.) and everyone was streaming and buying hard, and cheering each other on. I bought music for the first time ever, and have been making the most of premium accounts to maximize my streams. Don’t get me wrong, my group chats and Twitter feed were still like a big party, but interjected with metrics updates. It was exhausting but fun, and the puyat was well worth it. It’s still ongoing, by the way! Stream the album with us! Watch the two versions of the music video! Let’s get them the Billboard Hot 100 #1s for Jin’s birthday! They worked so hard for us; we’re working hard for them too.
While most of my friends immediately cried at the music video directed by Jungkook, my first tears came while listening to the album. Raissa and I were listening on a shared Spotify session because neither of us could be alone with our feelings, and I appreciated ‘having her with me’ even as she’s thousands of miles away in California. I was overcome with emotion and broke down in sobs -- which was so strange to me because the lyrics are in Korean, which I do not understand -- but I had started thinking about how grateful I felt to be listening to a new album of a group that had brought me so much joy the past few months. Literally my lifeline during such a dark and uncertain time. Somehow, even before I started looking at the lyrics translations, just by the vibes of the songs, I felt seen, understood, and spoken to. Once I started reading the lyrics* while listening, that feeling intensified:
Just like me, they also feel despair and grief and a weird pressure to be productive (Blue & Grey: “I just want to be happier, would this also be greed?” | Fly to my Room: “Feels like it’s still day one, somebody please turn the clock back, the whole year got stolen” | Dis-ease: “24 hours, I have so much time, even if I sleep all day long, there’s no problem now, it feels like I should be doing something to the point my body shatters”).
They also feel comforted that our connection will remain even if life isn’t the way it used to be (Life Goes On: “People say the world has changed, thankfully between you and I, it’s still the same” | Telepathy: “In the days that feel the same, I’m the happiest when I meet you” | Stay: “Like a crazy person, I keep sayin’, wherever you are, I know you’ll always stay”).
And somehow, they’ve managed to articulate what they are to me: a joyful and hopeful escape from all this anxiety (Life Goes On: “Close your eyes for a moment, hold my hand here, let’s run away to the future” | Telepathy: “Meaningless worries, lay them down for a moment, let’s enjoy it among ourselves, the little island in the middle of the blue ocean that we reminisce about together” | The entirety of Skit celebrating their first Billboard #1, the gift ARMY and BTS have given each other).
Also, did I mention that these songs are bops? As @prodynks tweeted, “First part of the album sad as hell then next thing you know you’re in the club.” Telepathy is my favorite song on this album, and now that video editor ARMYs are churning out edits left and right, I watch all the Telepathy edits that come up on my feed for a quick serotonin boost.
BE is a walang tapon, no-skips album. It acknowledges the difficulty of our reality and yet remains hopeful and comforting. They live-vlogged so much of their album-making process in the months prior to release because they wanted to remain connected to ARMY despite the canceled world tour, which is so perfectly BTS. The members stepped up with more hands-on creative roles for this project, and all the output is so much more personal to them, which makes me want to work harder for this to succeed. It’s so special, and it gets better with every listen, with deeper appreciation of the lyrics. I’m sad that I don’t speak Korean and totally get why so many fans have taken the plunge to learn. I’m planning to spend a lot of time this holiday season with the lyrics to their older songs. I want to give them everything I have, because they’ve given me so much!
I want to quote two reflections; the first is from @Aesopsfablefly which was posted the day before the comeback:
whew bangtan feelings hitting me hard man. bts really got me thru this yr. the countless ways they came online to help distract us & brighten our dark days was a lot. its been hard but their music/lyrics got me thru so much.. BE is coming & i just wanna give my all in return. like just sit and think about how much they did for us when they had absolutely no reason to. they could’ve done what many other artists/celebs did and just sat down, chilled out, not done anything to help anyone and took 6+ months out till their next album but no. bts’ album promo got cut short, their tour got cancelled and you could just tell they just weren’t in a good place after everything but bts gathered themselves & said ‘everyone’s struggling rn, what can we do to make it better’ they were donating so much to multiple charity organisations for covid relief, helping out staff who were left without work due to no touring, made a sht tonne of FREE content just to help distract fans who were stuck at home feeling scared & anxious cause of the pandemic like??? & then BTS were in the studio one day, heard a track that made them move and filled them with a spark of joy & their immediate thought was ‘we NEED to share this so others can feel the same too’. that’s it. that’s how we got dynamite cause they legit just wanted ppl to feel that. and even now they been going hard recording, writing, producing, practising so they can give us a piece of their heart & soul with BE. because music has always their way of healing, not just themselves but others too and they wanna give that, they wanna share that. the list just goes on & on tbh cause BTS really did not stop thinking abt how to help ppl despite struggling themselves how do i say thanks to that? how do i let them know what a huge source of comfort they been? idk. i’ll just give BE my all & hope they can feel it in return.
And the second is from @ETRNALGOO right after the album dropped:
‘BE’ feels like the tightest hug after the worst day ever, the warmth of a blanket after being in the cold, the scent of a freshly lit candle in the winter, the grip of a warm hand, the sun appearing after a long day of rain... comfort defined
I really feel sad for people who aren’t BTS fans, because life and 2020 is so much better with BTS. I would be miserable right now without them. Yoongi once said “You’ll like BTS music if you listen without prejudice” and I think it’s so true. They have such a rich and deep catalog of music, different genres pa! (The genre is ‘BTS’ haha) We’ll find out this week if the Western music industry will validate what ARMY already knows: BTS is one of the best artists in the game right now.**
I feel so grateful to have found them when I did — the ARMY saying is “you find them when you most need them” — and I’m so lucky I get to love them for a long time. As another famous ARMY saying goes, I’m in this Bangtan Sonyeondan shit for life.
* All translations are lifted from Doolset Bangtan. Do check out her lyric translations, she adds contextual notes that are very helpful.
** Read the post on Weverse magazine “BTS and the Grammys: Why now?” The tea is served hot! Weverse is owned by their label Big Hit Entertainment. I think this was such a ballsy move to post this before the nominations came out.
Read part 1 of last week’s newsletter here (regular non-BTS content) and everything I’ve published about BTS here. The next issues will land in your inbox if you subscribe using this button. Thanks for reading!
I purple you,
Pinky